will you be my maid of honor?

I have read and see a lot of people wondering about true friend whom in their observation has failed in finding one. Lots of backstabber has been found and these victims of backstabber started to shouting everywhere.

Five to six years ago, I started to know the backstabber's definition. It was painful, indeed. Clearly out of your mind when the person who done that is your close friend. Well I guess backstabber always come from our closest person because they are the one who know almost everything you've got even though you ain't have nothing. You are not rich. Not even pretty. Just an ordinary gal who of course have her own something-special but still, many flaws were seen. I have encountered numerous types of backstabbing activities and it gave me certain knowledge and lessons of being in that particular condition.

My story were done. So far for now, I still met with them but I don't give a damn. After all these years, meeting with such nuisance from any other kind give me strength and energy of ignorance and such. I have learnt how and when to be selfish which I never been able to do it before. I am not that kind who neglect others for my own priority. Well able to do that now is my biggest achievement towards life. =)

Now, I read lots of people especially in facebook started to shout about this issue. So now I know lots of people have encountered the same feelings as mine years ago. However, I reckon these people who talk about that is not someone whose straight, right and yes they was one of the b*tchstabber. So I guess the karma has begun. That is one thing of our Greatest Creator did in order to remind these people to awake and please... experience their feelings you've hurt yesterday. Its good to know about this, really. Allah is always fair and now I read about the people who trying to gain attention and gather clan as much as they can to do what...? Riot... I think? Oh, maybe just one condemn-organization for all they hate. Yeah, why not? Seems some of them still not learn the lessons, huh?

Will you be my maid of honor? Oh, I just remember you did traduced moi once upon a time. Nevermind. I'll find someone else. :D

Karma. One word. Value its lesson. And please... learn.

Love. Hugs. Kisses Kazoos.

Tweet #1

Im running out of energy. Been in front of Monetary manual is so not healthy. Im getting week! I yawned for gazillion times. This is not good. *sigh*

Love. Hugs. Kisses Kazoos.

ting! now you are one adorable cinderella =)

I didn't realize any until I encountered another nuisance (not going to bring it up again. Its just something that I realize... a bit late.) Wasn't really a nice type who will let it be what it supposed to be. I never let anything from my mind without knowing every single thing about it. A.N.Y.T.H.I.N.G.

Yes. I was a jerk. A total jerk. Crap. Shit. Whatever you may call. I was really blunt like never ever thought about others feelings. To me, it is nothing. Well then I learnt that not everyone like that. But sometimes you just have to face it when you have intemperance no matter how much you have avoid. Whatever happened, we will never can change how it went before. What we may do is to learn and never stop learning from the mistakes we have done.

Its nice to be this way. Yeah. I wish I am this cool back than. But hey, will never moved like this without any lesson learnt, right? Whatever people may say, that is their right to use their mouth, speak about someone else. Means you are famous and they really cant resist of you. Grab the positive one okay? That's why they still traducing 'bout thy.

Everyone has their own history. Even Sunshine was a total prankster before. But he did changed and tadaa... been total human now not yet beating people without any concrete reason (Hoh! Thank God I met you after you pass that stage. :D ) Well, he has changed and continue seeking whats best for him in future neither do I. The before moi is just like to mess around. My blunt-ness always be underestimate therefore I figure something. I cant let my blunt-ness fade awat, heck I dont intend to. I just keep it low and maintain silence almost all the time I never needed (well I think I managed that. Yay!).

In a nutshell (yeah I like to start with long rants whilst always focus main point in a conclusion. Haha!! Well, am very good in creating conclusions. =) ), whoever you (read: WAS) before, yesterday, seconds ago, there will be a space for you to change yourself to be better. Better than before, yesterday, seconds ago. Just let yourself do the action and please use your brain to work together. There's no use to look back and continuously do the same mistake.

Remember, no one is perfect. People who like to condemn you about your past is the one who never moved on. To be blunt, they are envy.

Love. Hugs. Kisses Kazoos.

once upon a diamond-second

I still remember how hard it was. T'was late night, when I back from work, sit in front my laptop with a hot tea and sometimes biscuits and bread to fill my empty tummy. I was exhausted simultaneously excited.

T'was late night. When I stare at my notes and start to let the tears fall. Yes I was exhausted again. But not that excited. I started to think, how long this will be? How many words must I fill in? What kind of drama should I create? And so... and so...

T'was late night, I called my loved one and start to weep. I was again... exhausted. He told that I must be strong. Victory ain't that easy. In fact, there's nothing easy in this world. So I start again and swept my tears. And so I recharged, again.

I felt it. The hardwork, struggle, and hope. It was there.. and still there. These few days has been good for me. I feel the blessing. Syukur Ya Allah for gave show me the path. It was something I never thought I would encountered. I feel great and blessed. It is Your mercy, I am still here. It is Your bless, I have my own masterpiece (oh I know I am so junior in this industry but yes, my first born baby is from my hardwork and stubborn-ness trying to figure out something inside. And yes, I did.)

Today, I couldn't believe my eyes and still not trying to believe although I have been happy like monkey. I jump on the couch, I stare at the laptop like I saw a ghost, my finger was cold, I shake my self upside down trying to get real. But it was what I saw. My eyes didn't lie. It was there. My pink chocolate is there. I feel like crying but I turn it to one cute (okay, I lied. It was a miserable) laugh.

I feel like reveal it here. But I couldn't. Somehow, I don't want to be more than I suppose to be. I am afraid. And I am not that confidence with myself. Maybe later. When Im ready. But now... I might just smile from far. Hope y'all will like it. Whatever 'it' is.

Love. Hugs. Kisses Kazoos.

aftermath

She was cheated.

By a boyfriend whose ungrateful to what she have done. Ungracious.

By a boyfriend whose call for a break through the phone. Coward.

By a boyfriend whose slept with another girl. Misbehave.

The revenge was paid.

She led an utmost fabulous life.

She won almost everything she encountered.

She was (still) blessed with her Most Merciful Allah.

She was surrounded by her besties. Who loves her so much.

I'm proud of you sayang. Hopefully this is the right path and will never end. I wish you meet with someone who can love and care for you the way it should be. The hell to that shit. Ain't nothing to you anymore. Happy ya!

Love. Hugs. Kisses Kazoos.